Randomly picking my first movie went smoothly! The pick turned out to be Automaton Transfusion (also known as Zombie Transfusion). That's great news because 1. I LOVE zombies and 2. I've been waiting to see this movie for over a year... so I'm jazzed.
One of my favorite horror news sites, Bloody-Disgusting.com, had great praise for this movie. They said it was a "holy grail of true independent horror films" and that it is "one of the best zombie films in decades". Now, I love getting my news from Bloody-Disgusting, but their reviews are... well... let's just politely say I don't always agree with them. So... I'm hoping this is one review I'll actually agree with. *crosses fingers*
The plot of the movie is centered on a group of teens who have to fight their way through a crazed army experiment gone horribly wrong, turning people in to zombies. For some reason, the group of teens determine that making their way to the high school, in the middle of the zombie apocalypse, is the safest place to find help and survivors. What? School? Seriously? Who the fuck picks school as an option for safety in a zombie invasion scenario??
Fast zombies. Ok. I'm already getting a little angry. Fucking fast zombies?? I HATE fast zombies! Agh! And the movie has only just started. If the army is involved, it means the zombies have a 50/50 chance of being FAKE zombies- i.e. people who are just infected with a diease that makes them go crazy and kill people. Like in 28 days later. THAT'S NOT A FUCKING ZOMBIE!!
We all hate movies that take 40 mins of set up time before you really get anywhere.
It doesn't take long to get to the zombie action. On that, they deliver. Even in these opening few mins, I can tell I'm already going be pissed with the camera work. The director is going for the "if the camera shakes during action it makes it more realistic, so i'll just shake the camera a lot!" approach. I really, really hate that shit. It always makes me feel like the director doesn't know how to show a scene that realistically portrays action so they use a cheap gimmick like shaking the camera and / or zooming in and out, thinking that will fix it. It doesn't.Some of the action scenes are just so ridiculous! There is a school scene where a teacher is bitten. When he is taken out to the ambulance on a stretcher, the EMT isn't even attempting to cover the gaping wound on his neck. Nice. Let him die from bleeding out. That's cool! Also, he's not strapped down on the stretcher, and the teacher is just kicking both legs up in the air at the same time. He looked so spastic! The scene is supposed to be surprising and tense, but it just turns laughable. Lots of chaotic movement to block poorly scripted action scenes and/ or special effects. Yum.
The special effects are hit or miss. Some scenes, the zombies look alright. Not exactly zombie looking though, more like someone who just got their asses kicked at a bar fight. Sure, they have pale skin, but really, no other sign of death. No glazed over eyes, no death skin ( bloated or sunken). I don't know what the budget for the movie was, but they clearly took some short cuts that even on a budget, there is no excuse for! Example - there is a shot of a bloody bed. Well, the way the blood was sprayed all over the bed was just silly. There was a big solid block of blood in the middle, that part was fine... but shooting off from the solid block, where all these unnatural lines of blood drips. It looked like they used a restaurant ketchup bottle instead of something that actually sprayed the blood around more randomly. That is bullshit. There is no reason for that! It's just sloppy film making. Doing blood is one of the easiest effects and it just drives me insane when people screw it up.
I don't know if this was on purpose or not, but none of the characters are very likable. There is hardly any character personality or depth.... and I'm not even asking for much! Just something to make the characters not so ho-hum. The movie really, just doesn't deal much with the human characters at all even though they are the "staring" roles. I can't even really tell you anyone's name other then there is a Scott. And I only know that because Scott had a party going on at his house and all the other characters beat it in to the ground that they were going to Scott's party. No fucking clue on anyone else. I get it, you just want 99% zombie carnage, and the rest really doesn't matter. Ok. Why not. At least you could do me the favor and drop the lame "I'm artsy!!" shots. Zombie carnage does not call for artsy shots like worm eye view of a lawnmower with a little bit of blood on the wheel, Ok?
*Sigh* This movie is just... bad. I blame writer /director. I can even deal with the bad acting. The fact that it is indie has nothing to do with it's badness either... I'm even over-looking the horrid film quality (which, looks like i could get better video on my iphone). The problems with this are mostly due to bad writing and bad camera shots.... just... plain bad directing. Live or die, I don't even care anymore. Just please, role the fucking credits.
According to IMDB.com, Automaton Transfusion started out as just a trailer, before it was turned to a movie and that it was shot in 9 days. It could maybe work as a trailer, but it doesn't really work as a movie.
Yikes. I hope my next random pick will be better then this!
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